Because guyz make mistakes, too.
Mistake #1: Re-living the Mish
Missions are great things; so are missionaries. But unfortunately, missions end after 2 years. Although it is important for males to utilize the social status of being a returned missionary and increase their future spouse potential (FSP), there are three common mistakes made when RM's re-live the glory days. These errors can be detrimental to your FSP by boring and scaring away females. By avoiding these blunders, you can more easily escape the stereotype of "weird RM," thereby avoiding the "creeper list." (All girls have one.)
First mistake, filling date conversations with nothing but, "Back on the mish*..." Don't get us wrong, we love to hear about your mission and we are so impressed that you decided to serve the Lord for two years, but we can only say, "Wow, that is so interesting," so many times. We know it was the best two years of your life--we watched the movie! But we would like to feel that that you are happy to be here with us at Applebees, and not daydreaming of eating rice on the floor in some rural Japanese village. There is more to life than the good memories you made with your "comp." If you love him so much, take him to dinner!
Second mistake, confusing foreign customs with American customs. In the various countries around the world, there are indeed other customs; most of us have taken Anthropology 101. But it's not always polite or proper to bring those customs back to the U.S. as habits. For example, gaucho suit pants are only acceptable in such places as the Philippines (as is wearing flip flops to church). Burping after meals is commonly accepted in Tonga, and not at our dinner table (and a little chuckle and explanation of how it's polite to burp after a meal where you served your mission does not make it okay, either.) Taking off your shoes while indoors may be respectful in some parts of the world, but when you are in the middle of Book of Mormon class, it does not show respect to anyone around you to kick off your Rockports; it just smells and makes people feel uncomfortable.
And third mistake, thinking it is awesome to write, speak, and bear your testimony in a foreign language months and months after you have returned from your mission. It is incredibly impressive that you are bilingual, it's more than I can say for myself. But we do not understand you. We don't. We like to hear the crazy sounds coming out of your mouth for a while, but there comes a point when we would like to get something out of the precious time spent listening to you speak. So don't continue to pray in Tagalog or whisper sweet nothings to us in Albanian during sacrament meeting over and over.
So, try and avoid these faux pas at all costs if you want a date this Friday night. Or go ahead and use them freely as a Get Out of a Relationship Free card.
*It is NOT okay to shorten mission to mish; it sounds like you are saying "miss" with a speech impediment.